THAT WAS THE LONGEST POST OF MY LIFE.

Current Location: lost in my writing...
Current Mood: crazy
Current Music: The Luckiest - Ben Folds

I knew that there were plenty of sources that I would be using during this research project, and so I decided to use a blog post to take a few seconds to write about the ones that I have so far and also the ones that I found the most interesting.  My sources include people, websites, blogs, and books (reference books, essays).

The Souls of Black Folk - W.E.B DuBois

A compilation of writings by W.E.B DuBois after the end of slavery that discussed the color divide between blacks and whites.  This book gave me an idea of where to start and told me how early I was able to trace the discussion of the black identity.  DuBois, in his essays and sketches, speaks about how racial prejudice impacts the individual, so I was able to read about the identity issues DuBois wrote about. 

America in Black and White: A Nation, Indivisible - Abigail and Stephen Thernstrom

Stephen Thernstrom addressed race as "the problem that doesn't get solved and won't go away." In part, the pessimistic tone of the book discusses the changing status of blacks, and how the damage is irreconcilible.  An idea this book stresses is racial progress, with the idea that the "end of the road" is nowhere in sight, but that the progress has been great in the years since the North and the South. 

Black Queer Studies: A Critical Anthology - Patrick Johnson and Mae G. Henderson

A Compilation of established/emerging scholars about the questions concering black queer studies as a new area of study that has been developing over the years.  Merging studies on race and sexuality, the editors of this book claim that it's time for "black studies to incorporate queer realities, and for gay studies to include black truths.

W.E.B DuBois
http://www.duboislc.org/html/DuBoisBio.html

This source helped me to formulate a better idea of W.E.B DuBois' life and the circumstances that led him to do the work he did and hold the opinions he discussed in his writings.  During his life, he began to study blacks as a "social system," leading him to plunge early into research about the race problem, one he viewed as ignorance and unawareness.  Reading about DuBois gave me a different perspective about why people do these kinds of studies on race.

Tags: bibliography
Current Location: my favorite chair...
Current Mood: pleased
Current Music: The Voice Within - Christina Aguilera

Before I began this blog, I already had opinions about the issues within the black community, let alone the issues between the black communities and others.  

For me, being African-American has been one of the hardest things, because I constantly feel as though I am not good enough.  I allow others to give me this essence of what being African-American should be, instead of being allowed to decide who I am, my values and beliefs, and where I fit within the black community. 

Being black means many things to me.  One of those things is conformity.  In my life, one of the biggest issues has been me not conforming to the values, mannerisms, and attitudes of other African-Americans surrounding me, and this is one of the first issues I have noticed inside the depths of the black community.  I am different, and different seems bad.  I have been told that as someone who is black, "I need to defend my race.  My race should always come first, no matter what," and I have been told that I am a "disgrace to black people."  

If I dress differently, speak differently, and react differently then the black people who tell me I am different, is it at that moment that I become an outcast? I am trying to understand black culture, and why you have to act a certain way in order to "qualify" as being black.  

It sometimes feels as though since being black has brought on this stereotype, and there is not enough power or influence to change the stereotype, people that are black embrace the stereotype and allow it to be a part of who they are.  I am trying not to do that, and I am being punished for it.  I have yet to tell whether the root of the problem is hate within a race, ignorance of others, or just me being naive.

Tags: black culture, issues, stereotype
Current Location: where i always am...
Current Mood: envious
Current Music: Reasons to Love You - Meiko

What is Race?

1. Any of the traditional divisons of humankind characterized by supposedly distinct and physical characteristics.
 
2. An arbitrary classification of modern humans based on any or a combination of varoius physical characteristics.

3. A human population partially isolated reproductively from other populations, whose members share a greater degree of physical and genetic similarity with one another than with other humans.

When we are born, immediately we are classified into a group depending on how we look.  As we get older, we develop a language, a culture distinct to that race.  Whether we are proud of our race or absolutely disgusted, it is our race.  It is a part of who we are, but it does not define who we become.  While doing this research, I have hoped to define race and figure out a sense of who I am. I have also hoped to define Racism, something that I feel society tries to make subjective. 



Racism

1. Hatred or intolerance of another race or other races

2. A policy, system of government, etc., based upon or fostering such a doctrine; discrimination.

3. The belief that race accounts for differences in human character or ability, and that a particular race is superior to others.

I think racism is one of the biggest issues that has been adressed/needed to be addressed in our country's history.  How do we define Racism? How do we recognize racism? How do we fix racism? Who decides what actions are racist? Is there such thing as reverse racism? These are questions I wanted answered, but do not feel I can answer with my level of experience. I have decided to take a survey, one about the issues in my blog. I think perspective and opinion play a big role in this project, so I need to hear from others.

Tags: race, racism
Current Mood: discontent
Current Music: Unlike Me - Kate Havnevik

Lately, I have been trying to create an outline of what it is exactly that I have this blog for. In a paragraph, how can I accurately describe my blog, On Being African American. It gets really frustrating being asked to describe my blog and being at a loss of words, unable of how to describe this.

On Being African American is a blog to discuss the interaction of the African-American community and to address the changing perspectives of different aspects of this community. The past 100 years have played a role as W.E.B DuBois spoke about the color line and the issue of the relationship between blacks and whites. Years later, I am trying to better understand the interactions within the African-American community. My research questions include:

What is race? How do we define Racism? Is the definition of racism relative?

Have the perceptions of the African-American community changed? How have these perceptions changed?

What are some of the issues within the African-American community? Have these issues been properly addressed?

Are the issues towards or between African-Americans reflected in current events?

Tags: on being african american, race
Current Location: my bedroom :)
Current Mood: thoughtful
Current Music: Keep it Loose, Keep it Tight - Amos Lee

David Brooks, of the Salt Lake Tribune, wrote an article recently, "Genius: The modern view," an inside look on the idea that everyone has their genius. The article is an exploration of the "genius," and ultimately points to some of the most talented people we've all heard of not as geniuses, but just people who rigorously practiced their skill. I really enjoyed the article because I have not heard o any articles like this, and this Brooks' perspective and sense of surroundings strikes me as really observant.

I wonder if other people see it the same way as David Brooks does. Although I understand that these people were not born geniuses, and I agree that it is very practical to connect meticulous practice to amazing end results, something still does not click. The part of this article that I could probably connect to the most is the end of the article that discusses slow practice and the breaking down into strenuous, small repitition in order to perfect a task or skill. There are many things that I do well, but I do not do them the right way, such as some technical parts of volleyball. It makes me very upset that currently I'm in a situation where I am constantly being told to change and that I need to break this habit immediately, because it's damn well not going to be immediate.

Anyhow, I really enjoyed this article, I am good that I got to come across it. David Brooks shared some of his thoughts about the "genius" that I don't think I would've otherwise looked at.

"Everyone has their own genius"
-Anonymous

Tags: articles, genius, perspective
Current Location: in my bedroom..
Current Mood: anxious
Current Music: Falling In Love at a Coffee Shop -Landon Pigg

For my checkpoint, I decided to write my own type of lyrical monologue about an issue I addressed/will address in my blog. The piece that I wrote was not something I felt very comfortable reading in class because

a.) I stutter
b.) I get nervous
c.) high school audiences...enough said
d.) certain people in my classroom whose opinions I can't stand
e.) My own insecurities that I am entitled to (because I said so)

Anyhow, I do hope you all will read this, since you might end up liking it, even if you have no idea what I'm talking about. Let me know what you think, comments, suggestions, opinions.

Thanks guys!


Fighting My Own Battles

I rise with the sun, my eyes taking in all things around me;
I must be wary of the battles I have to overcome,
because I cannot win, I'm fighting a two front war--
with myself and society.
Have all of my perceptions failed me?
Am I blind?
I wish that what I couldn't see couldn't hurt me.
But that is not the case.
It seems I am a reflection of my surroundings.
I am a paradox; I am black and intellectual.

"You're so white."
And so it begins, this hatred between me and society.
"You're ashamed of your race."
What do you know about me and the relationship I have with my race?
"Why do you care, whats so wrong with white?"
It is not about being white,
it is about being me, it is about who I am.

I've been walking through life with a label on my back,
where people perceive me as white or black.
I've tried taking them down but there's just too much.
So I'm left dangerously close to giving up,
and so near to letting them just write who I am.
I do not know what to believe, who to believe, who to trust.
Still I have no idea what I'm supposed to believe in.
I don't know if I'm right or if I'm wrong;
So I am left scared, and the night is long.

My thoughts set with the sun,
my mind stops racing, my feet stop quickly pacing.
For a moment, all is quiet, and I take in this unsettling peace,
the thought that I may have runaway from yet another fight,
but the end is yet to come, and at this point,
I am still losing this race.
The outside of me shines like the moon,
but still my soul continues to fight,
trying to emerge.
But there is no spotlight.

-Makshya Tolbert

Tags: checkpoints, spoken word
Current Location: all over the place.
Current Mood: indescribable

Recently, a friend showed me a video she found that addressed the issue of someone with racist actions.  The video explained a lot about how when you perceive someone as having done something that was racist, you want to confront them with the problem and tell them they did something racist.  However, that does not mean that they are racist, or that you want to go into detail about the kind of person you are, it is specifically about holding them accountable for their actions. 



Although I have always wanted to address this, and make this point, I never had good reasons for it.  In other words,  I was never able to put it into words.  I think this could possibly be useful to anyone who needs to confront someone on their actions.  

Tags: confrontation, illdoctrine, racist
Current Location: home sweet home
Current Music: Day & Nite - Kid Cudi

"African-American women are ignorant, crafty, treacherous, theivish, and mistrustful," (Edward Long, 1744).

Since I've been researching and writing in this blog, I have come upon many different studies about racial and cultural issues.  One of the articles I was reading was called "Race, Racism, and Law: Speaking Truth to Power," by Marilyn Yarbrough.  She touched base on a cultural issue faced by African-American women and discussed how they seem to be constantly compared to White women.  Starting at the times during slavery, African-American women are portrayed as deviant, to the current generalization now that many black women are immoral, and therefore "less deserving of protection from abuse and exploitation," (Common Stereotypes of African American Women, Yarbrough).  Edward Long, a writer during the 18th century, published conclusions about African American women in an attempt to support slavery, stating that "African-American women are ignorant, crafty, treacherous, theivish, and mistrustful." 

Black women, like many women of color, suffer from the "triple threat burden" of race, gender, and class.  I am trying to rise above that, trying to overcome the idea that I, as a black women, am loud and ghetto with nappy hair.  I am not loud because I am black.  If I am seen as loud or outspoken, it is because I have a lot to say.  

 

You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?
'Cause I walk like I've got oil wells
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops,
Weakened by my soulful cries.

Does my haughtiness offend you?
Don't you take it awful hard
'Cause I laugh like I got gold mines
Diggin' in my own back yard.

You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I'll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history's shame
I rise
Up from a past that's rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.

 

Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that's wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.
-Maya Angelou (1978)

I love this poem because I feel as thought it properly describes the struggles that not only black women, but all women have faced over time.  I think this poem also exposes some of the hidden insecurities linked with racism that I have yet to write about.  Right now, I am really focused on some of the insecurities of black women that I know, including myself.  

 "I'm not stubborn because of the color of my skin; I'm stubborn because my mom raised me to question everything. I'm not oblivious to these stereotypes but I refuse to feed into them," (Oneika Richardson).
 

Tags: african-american women, maya angelou, stereotypes
Current Location: Liv's house.
Current Mood: accomplished
Current Music: Umbrella - Marie Digby

"The problem of the twentieth century is the problem of the color line," (W.E.B DuBois).


W.E.B DuBois was an influential writer in the early 1900's.  He spoke of black nationalism and addressed the issues of justice in the United States.  As a writer, the race problem dominated his works, and he discussed many ideas such as double consciousness.  



Right now, I have begun reading The Souls of Black Folk by W.E.B DuBois. DuBois tries to explain "the strange meaning of being black here in the dawning of the Twentieth Century," (The Souls of Black Folk, DuBois) and further discusses the freedom of the black race, the effects of the emancipation, and the influential leaders at the time. The Souls of Black Folk is a treatise with a series of essays.

Tags: double consciousness, literature, w.e.b dubois
Current Location: my living room...as usual...
Current Mood: curious
Current Music: Think Of Me - Andrew Lloyd Weber